I have been thinking about the limits on my life just now.
Jesus accepts limits if he lives in me. On the other hand, nothing is impossible with God.
It is hard (for me) to give thanks for loss, even as I give fervent thanks that my Father in Heaven gave up His only begotten Son for me. That example, while a wonder of grace and love, is a hard one for me to follow. Or, perhaps more accurately, for my natural man to follow. My uncrucified natural man, to be exact. While the promise of resurrection is thrilling to my heart and soul, my natural man finds it hard to get excited about the death part that has to come first.
The testimonies from those who are weak and broken arrive with a strange power and inexplicable light. I have a friend who broke her neck as a teenager and for the last 30+ years has lived as a quadriplegic. She is smiling every time I see her at church in her motorized wheelchair. When she talks excitedly about driving up to Gainesville for football games I shake my head.
There is something going on that only the Spirit of Man can finally comprehend and that will only be fully seen in Eternity with Jesus. Today, with the broken and incomplete shambles yet hindering me, I cannot taste or touch or see it. I can only hope for it, trusting that my hope will not be ashamed.
My Heavenly Father, in His kindness, has given me glimpses of how my season of brokenness is encouraging others (and I shake my head in wonderment at such stories). But for me, it is the experience of brokenness that grips my attention.
I am certainly not alone, or even the one suffering the most. But the season lingers. Lord, may I come to the end of it and be found faithful to You, in You. Thank you for the blood of Jesus that covers even my sins of doubt and fear. Thank you that you have only good gifts to give us and that all things are working for our good when we are serving you.
Still … for today … Lord, have mercy. Christ, have mercy. Lord, have mercy.